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I have a few posts for mommies that I will be putting up shortly- but I want to give a little “Shout Out” to the adoptive moms out there. We can have a tough road, adoption is not easy, and doesn’t always have a happy ending. The road to adoption can hurt for many reasons, and it is often a long and painful road, whether you can conceive or not. (For the record- never assume all adoptive parents can’t carry. It’s not true, and it’s not nice to have to talk about, either way.)
We CHOSE to adopt, and we also gave birth to a baby later. Our daughter was adopted as an older child, and we have met many people and heard all sorts of stories- sad and wonderful, gut-wrenching and just amazing. Adoptions from birth, as teenagers, and everywhere in between.
All of our families are “real”, and they are also “our” kids. You may not believe the things that we have had said to us (IE- “Does your daughter know she’s adopted?” while she is standing right there. What if she didn’t??? Of course she does, but still. Why point out her different appearance?)
And while you don’t have to walk on eggshells with adoptive families- we get stared at and point blank asked a lot of personal questions, so if you are curious- ask nicely. We will all talk to you if you are nice about it 🙂
Kamikaze doesn’t like me to put her pictures on the site, so I don’t post her photos unless she’s cool with it. Once in a while, she OK’s it, LOL. But she’s here, and though we don’t have a “fairy tale” ending and she has some issues that we have to deal with that are NOT fun at all- she’s our kid too. Please remember the adoptive moms, too, on Mother’s Day. They had to work hard for their kids just to get them here. We are just moms like anyone else! I saw about 6 posts in the past few days about how moms are moms once they give birth, and I just wanted to say- YOU ARE A MOM THE MINUTE THAT YOUR CHILD IS PUT INTO YOUR ARMS- I don’t care how long it takes that child to get there.
Just my thought of the day.
And I am sorry for this rushed post- it’s been a long day. But I just had to say it.
Love ya, mommas!!! (and daddies, grandmas, all ya’ll!!! Hahaha)
TGIF!
~Samantha
Not flesh of my flesh, Nor bone of my bone,
But still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute,
You didn’t grow under my heart – but in it
— Fleur Conkling Heylinger
Just stopping in for some Alexa love from PITM! 🙂
Indeed – it’s more than just giving birth. For many of us (like me) that is our transformation process – but it can happen through other means as well.
Glad you gave a shout out – I would, but I don’t feel quite right doing it since I’m not an adoptive mother.
Also a shout out for Step Moms who get a bad rap but step into a child’s life like my daughter did and showed a little boy what it is really like to have a Mother’s love. 🙂
Happy Mom’s day to you!
Thanks for such a great post. My older sister had a difficult time getting pregnant, she adopted one then gave birth to two then adopted two more. My niece and now my daughter are adopting.
As you know, I never had any trouble having kids…just the opposite. It was interesting that I was made to feel guilty because I could have kids easily and my sister and niece couldn’t. It was like I was hogging all the babies so there were none left for them.
And the comments I get from people about having a large family are just as interesting…
Both sides of the spectrum I guess!
Happy Mothers Day!
Very well said! I know many mothers who have had to give up their children (it was in the childs best interest) and I know mothers who adopted children. Every mother… Very couragous for what they do! I give adoptive mothers props for adopting children… They made a diffence in that childs life! Happy early mothers day to all the mothers, grandmothers, great grandmothers …
Adoption is a wonderful choice. If my life had been different I would’ve loved to have adopted.
~Mimi from PITM
Great post:) I fully believe in adoption! As you know my cousin adopted a little boy who is amazing! Our family wouldn’t be the same without him and I can;t even imagine the life he would have had if he hadn’t been adopted! (His birth mom was only 13)…so Happy Mother’s day to you! No matter how we have our children, they are still ours, loved by us and are what make us mommys!
Great Post~as I know people on both ends of adoption and it is a wonderful thing!
Thanks so much Samantha! Happy Mother’s Day to you too! I’m an adoptive mom to a 3 1/2 yr old and there’s no way I could love my son more if I gave birth to him! 🙂 I often joke that we wouldn’t have made such a handsome boy on our own, too!
I’m actually turning in my homestudy tomorrow to apply to adopt again and couldn’t be happier to do this again!
Thanks for such a wonderful post!
Julie
Shout out to my Aunt, who is the adoptive mother to my only cousins! <3